only if we run a train.
done.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize