and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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