I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
