There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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