the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
