And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
