There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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