So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
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