I wanna bring you to show and tell
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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