Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
