69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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