hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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