I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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