The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
