ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize
