Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
