what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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