ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
