I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
