ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
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