Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
