You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Randomize
