I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
He kissed a someone with a penis
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
