i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
