Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Randomize
