on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
