We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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