I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
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