i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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