...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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