awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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