why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
