i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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