i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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