She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize