Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Randomize
