Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Randomize
