Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
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