the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
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