Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize