He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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