I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
