Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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