I saw his package. It spoke to me.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Randomize
