It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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