Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize