Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
