So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Randomize
