Just mADE A PArabola og urine
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
tell me about the eggs
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
