go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Randomize
