Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
